Without saying goodbye- a letter to my Mamatherapist

“I’ve been hesitating whether to tell you this news or not for a while.” My therapist said to me. My muscles shook and my heart started pounding. In only a few seconds, my mind rapidly conjured possibilities and questions. “I’m going to quit my job here in this hospital at the end of August” she…


SANTAberries = greek yogurt + strawberry + chocolate +  marshmallow  

Little Things 

People ask me what makes me happy. Honestly, I don’t think if there’s anything that can just magically makes me happy, fixes all my problems or takes away the pain; but I do believe that doing something as permanent can keep me at a general level. Treatment. That’s what keeps me going and makes through…


Go take a chair and sit down cause I’m about to write shit tons in Chinese✪✪✪ ~~~ 錯過了,又錯過了。 原本相信自己這次真的是萬念俱灰,憤怒受傷的心已不再抱有任何希望。 腦子轉呀轉,想的盡是自我了斷的方法。 好痛快啊,沒想到期待死亡的快感竟然比活著生不如死的枯沉還要讓我覺得自己是活著的! 「一死百了」,我一直都不認同這成語。自殺並無法解決什麼問題;但,至少,可以讓活著的人體會我不被了解的痛苦。自私嗎?你們才自私吧! 接續前段所言,我理應已臉色發青,懸掛在生死邊緣,但我此刻卻在這寫下無濟於事的感言,表示我沒有行動於我的衝動。 痛,我的心臟也感受到的痛。痛在我一再的相信身邊那些所謂的無能,相信還有希望,相信還有機會改變。現實卻一再的證明我的相信僅是濫情—毀滅殆盡的自尊心。 憤怒與絕望從受傷的心底湧出,淹沒也吞噬了我。我自胸口噴出長長的烈焰,想要你們體會我的痛苦,卻驚然發現,自己已囚禁於人煙荒誕之地。 你們,皆為鋼鐵之心? 錯過了,盡是折磨。

Lonely Street and Me-2

Rushing winds and gloomy skies, I stand still in the lonely street, with bone-chilling winds piercing into my thought, facing and staring the dead soul of myself, oh, oh why? so fragile and pale.

write a sad story with 3 words

Comment yours below👇🏻  Wifi isn’t working  Trump is president  Fridge is empty  Tomorrow is Monday  Sandwich without peanut butter  Just a friend  Pizza sold out ☺☻☺

Lonely Street and Me-1

  For the whole week I can only hear my heartbeats Can’t fall asleep Can’t find peace I’m a Frisbee Threw about above the steep My beliefs slowly leak And my soul bleeds Something salty rolling down my cheeks Cold street Lonely me


I can feel the weight of all the pain and afflictions crashing down on my shoulder.   Breathing is heavy. Smiling is heavy. Talking is heavy. Knowing I’m still alive is heavy. Everything is just way too heavy.   Nobody ever tells me that things would turn out this way.   I feel like a…

Saying Sorry

Sometimes saying SORRY doesn’t always mean I’m WRONG, it’s just because I value the relationship more than my pride. I swallowed my pride, and took a deep breath. ”Sorry, I’m home.” Thank you for giving me a hug, I know we’re both a bit unsure about it. Thank you for telling me that you still…

Leaving Home

12:12 a.m. is that magical moment when all the anger turns into tears.   After that horrible event I moved out of home and lived in a hotel (with mom of course), by this way I hope to calm a bit down and distract myself from those overwhelming negatives. I swear it’s definitely the worst…

You Hurt Me and I Say Sorry?

You left, so I started to write. ~You threw me into my bed, again and again, I hit the wall, and hurt my bones. I couldn’t believe it was real, that things happened more than twice in a year. Your apologizes are just shining lies hanging up on the sky. Lies, lies. Glittery lies. It’s…